Most project managers think they’re good at stakeholder engagement. They believe they communicate clearly. They believe they “keep people informed.” They believe they understand who matters and why.
And then the project misses deadlines. Or blows the budget. Or delivers something nobody actually wanted. Their belief is shot. And suddenly the same people are asking: “What went wrong?”
I’ll tell you exactly what went wrong. You didn’t engage your stakeholders. Not really. You managed them on paper. You categorized them. You built a neat little grid. You told yourself you had it handled.
But you didn’t actually understand them. And that’s the difference between projects that succeed and projects that quietly collapse under the weight of false assumptions.
There’s a version of stakeholder engagement that gets taught everywhere. You’ve seen it. I teach it. Power on one axis. Interest on the other.
Plot your stakeholders into four boxes (Then tailor your communication strategy accordingly):
High Power / High Interest
High Power / Low Interest
Low Power / High Interest
Low Power / Low Interest
Clean. Simple. Efficient. (And dangerously misleading if you get one thing wrong.)
But… most people don’t get the framework wrong. They get the inputs wrong.
Because they don’t actually know their stakeholders’ level of interest.
They assume it. And those assumptions quietly kill projects.
I teach a simple way to think about stakeholder prioritization: Power × Interest = Engagement Priority.
Not added. Multiplied. Because a stakeholder with high power and high interest is exponentially more important than someone who only checks one of those boxes.
But here’s where things break down. Power is usually easy to identify. Interest is not.
And instead of doing the work to figure it out, most project managers take a shortcut. They assume: Senior leaders = high interest and junior personnel = low interest. That assumption feels logical.
It’s also wrong more often than you’d like to admit.
Let me paint a picture you’ve likely lived through. You’ve got a senior executive tied to your project. Big title. Big influence. Big presence in the org chart. So you treat them like a high-power, high-interest stakeholder.
You build: Detailed weekly reports, comprehensive slide decks, long-winded updates packed with data, and more.
You send them over, feeling like you’re crushing it. And what do you get in return? Nothing. Crickets. No feedback. No direction. No engagement.
So you follow up. Still nothing. And then you start to wonder: “Why aren’t they engaging?” Here’s the answer. Because they’re not interested. Not in the way you think.
Maybe your project is one of twenty things on their plate. Maybe it’s politically necessary for them to be listed as a stakeholder. Maybe they only care when something goes wrong. But whatever the reason, their interest level is low, even if their power level is high.
And yet you’re treating them like they want a dissertation every week. That’s not engagement. That’s noise.
Now let’s flip it. There’s someone on your project who doesn’t have a big title. They’re not in the executive meetings. They don’t control budget approvals. So you categorize them as low power. And without even thinking about it, you mentally downgrade their importance.
But here’s what you miss. They care. Deeply. They’re invested in the outcome. They’re the ones who will actually use what you deliver. They’re the ones who see the risks before they become issues. They’re the ones who are paying attention when everyone else is distracted.
And you ignore them. Or worse, you give them the same generic communication you send to everyone else. No customization. No engagement. No real dialogue.
And then later, when something breaks, you find out: They saw it coming. They just weren’t heard.
Projects don’t usually fail because of bad schedules. They don’t fail because of imperfect tools. They don’t fail because your Gantt chart wasn’t pretty enough.
They fail because people were not aligned. And people are not aligned because they were not engaged. And they were not engaged because you misunderstood what they actually cared about.
This is not a problem with your PM tools. This is not a framework problem. This is a thinking problem.
The biggest mistake in stakeholder engagement is assuming that power equals interest.
It doesn’t. Power tells you what someone can do. Interest tells you what someone will do.
Those are not the same thing. A high-power, low-interest stakeholder might only show up when there’s a fire. A low-power, high-interest stakeholder might be your best early warning system.
If you treat them the same, you are setting yourself up for failure. If you ignore one in favor of the other, you are making a strategic mistake. And yet this happens every day.
Here’s the part that should frustrate you a little. Because the fix is not complicated. It doesn’t require a new tool. It doesn’t require a new certification. It definitely doesn’t require a 40-hour bootcamp (nor does this make you memorize a book).
It requires one thing. Ask.
That’s it. Ask your stakeholders about their level of interest. Not once. Not casually. But intentionally. Directly. Clearly.
You can say something as simple as: “On a scale of 1-5 how interested are you in this?” “How involved do you want to be in this project?” “What level of detail is useful to you?” “How often do you want updates?” “What decisions do you want visibility into?”
And then you listen. Really listen. Because most stakeholders will tell you exactly what they need. (We just never give them the chance.)
When you start asking instead of assuming, everything changes. The senior executive might say: “I don’t need weekly updates. Just tell me if something goes off track.” Perfect. You just saved yourself hours of unnecessary reporting. And more importantly, you aligned your communication to their actual interest.
The junior team member might say: “I’d like to stay closely involved. This project impacts my team directly.” Perfect. Now you know you have an engaged stakeholder who can provide valuable insight.
You didn’t change the framework. You changed the accuracy of your inputs.
And that changes everything.
Once you know power and interest accurately, your communication becomes intentional. Not generic. Not bloated. Not misaligned.
Intentional.
High Power / High Interest: These are your key players. Engage them frequently. Be clear. Be concise. Be prepared. They want substance, not fluff.
High Power / Low Interest: Respect their time. Keep updates short. Focus on exceptions, risks, and decisions. Don’t drown them in detail they don’t want.
Low Power / High Interest: Engage them. Listen to them. Leverage them. They are often your best source of ground truth.
Low Power / Low Interest: Keep them informed at a basic level. Don’t over-invest here.
This isn’t new. What’s new, for most people, is actually getting the classifications right.
Let me address another problem. Too many project managers think communication equals volume. More emails. More meetings. More reports. More slides. That’s not communication. That’s activity.
Real communication is about clarity and relevance. If your stakeholder doesn’t care about what you’re sending, it doesn’t matter how polished it is. It’s still ineffective. And… ineffective communication is one of the leading contributors to project failure.
Not because people didn’t talk. But because they didn’t talk about the right things, to the right people, in the right way.
This is where we separate management from leadership. Management organizes work. Leadership mobilizes people.
Stakeholder engagement sits firmly in the leadership category. Because it requires you to: Understand motivations. Adjust your approach. Build trust. Communicate with intent.
You cannot outsource this to a template. You cannot automate it with a tool. You have to do the work. And that work starts with curiosity.
Don’t get me wrong… frameworks are highly useful. They give you structure. They give you a starting point. But they are not a substitute for thinking. If you’re filling out a stakeholder matrix without ever speaking to your stakeholders, you’re not doing project management. You’re doing paperwork. And paperwork doesn’t deliver results.
People do.
Let’s bring this back to outcomes. When you misjudge stakeholder interest: You waste time creating irrelevant communication. You miss critical insights from engaged stakeholders. You delay decisions because the right people aren’t involved. You erode trust because stakeholders feel ignored or overwhelmed.
And eventually, the project suffers. Not because you didn’t try. But because you tried the wrong things.
Asking about their level of interest isn’t a one-time activity. Stakeholder interest changes. Priorities shift. Projects evolve. So you ask again. And again. You check in. You adjust. You stay aligned.
Because engagement is not static. It’s dynamic. And if you treat it like a one-and-done exercise, you will fall behind.
Let me simplify this down to something you can actually use today.
Stop guessing. Stop assuming. Stop projecting your own expectations onto your stakeholders. Ask them what they care about. Listen to the answer.
Act accordingly.
That’s it.
That’s the difference between thinking you’re good at stakeholder engagement…and actually being good at it.
And if your projects aren’t delivering the outcomes you expect, there’s a strong chance this is where the breakdown is happening. Not in your tools. Not in your schedule. Not in your budget. But in your understanding of the people who make all of those things matter.
Fix that, and everything else starts to fall into place.
